String 2020 Performance Art and Experimental Video 2020 Video Links: https://vimeo.com/879232596?share=copy

String 2020 Performance Art and Experimental Video 2020

String 2021 Installation: record player, vinyl record, monitor (computer), video 2021 record player: 35.5*27*33.5cm monitor (computer) 1 : 36.5*28.5*34.5cm monitor (computer) 2: 42*23.6*38cm

String

Performance Art, Experimental Video, Installation art 2020-2023

"String" is an intimate and profound exploration of my relationship with my mother, a project that holds immense personal significance. It extends beyond being a mere artwork; it represents an ongoing journey of understanding and reconciliation within the context of my family.

The genesis of "String" can be traced back to the year 2020, a period characterized by my high school years. During this time, my relationship with my mother was marked by resistance and difficulty. Growing up in a traditional Chinese educational environment had imposed substantial pressure and expectations on me, with my mother often serving as the conduit for these expectations. Consequently, I began to distance myself from my family, avoiding conversations, and harboring a deep-seated fear of confronting my mother.

Nearly every piece of art I created during my high school years was a response to my mother's lack of understanding and disapproval. I continuously sought to break free from the expectations and judgments imposed upon me in my artistic endeavors.

With "String," I embarked on my first earnest attempt to engage in a meaningful conversation with my mother. However, my lingering fear prevented me from confronting her directly. To facilitate this dialogue, I constructed a room with two chairs, each separated by a partition, allowing us to converse without seeing each other's expressions or movements. Inside this confined space, we delved into a profound conversation that stretched for nearly an hour. I candidly shared the stress and pain I felt, laying bare the emotional scars left by her actions.

At the heart of this conversation lay a symbolic string, intertwined with strands of our hair. This string represented a pivotal connection, signifying the bond between us. I presented her with a choice: either to cut the string, thereby relinquishing the pressure and responsibilities she placed upon me, or to preserve it, embracing her role as a mother. I, too, was faced with the same choice. I chose to sever the string, desiring to grant her the freedom to lead a life beyond the confines of motherhood.

In contrast, my mother opted to retain the string intact, believing that the weight of her expectations was an integral component of my role within the family. She deemed it essential for me to bear these responsibilities, asserting that severing the string would rupture our family ties.

To convey the intricacies of this narrative, I chose a silent format for the film screening. The split-screen presentation mirrored the physical partition that separated us during our conversation. This choice allowed viewers to witness the exchange without access to the content of our dialogue, symbolizing the removal of one barrier while introducing an invisible layer of emotional distance.

"String" presents an open-ended narrative, encouraging viewers to interpret it in their own way. Whether it symbolizes the removal of a barrier or the introduction of emotional distance, this work captures the complexities of our relationship. It leaves space for individual interpretation, acknowledging that the untold stories that follow can only be understood by my mother and me.

The second part of "String" delves into the realm of the record player. Following a heartfelt conversation with my mother, I began to contemplate that the disconnect between us might extend beyond our individual experiences. I wondered if this sense of disconnection transcended generations, as my mother and her mother had potentially grappled with similar emotions, albeit expressed differently. I embarked on a journey to my grandmother's home to engage in a heartfelt dialogue, a record of which I captured in text and audio.

During our conversations, I posed numerous questions about my mother and the story of their relationship. Yet, to my surprise, I encountered no evident discord or contradictions. Their relationship appeared harmonious, and my quest for deeper insights was somewhat thwarted by the limitations of personal biases. However, behind the veneer of familial harmony, one could discern the subtle shades of the human experience. Even amidst apparent harmony, relationships can bear complexities and contradictions, forging a unique beauty. It was my revelation that relationships need not be marred by conflict; they can be harmonious and beautiful in their own right, a perspective that transcends generational shifts.

The format of the record player was chosen for a poignant reason. When I spent time with my grandmother, she often played the songs of the renowned Chinese singer, Teresa Teng. These melodies became the soundtrack to our conversations and my stay at her home. Upon returning to my own residence, I discovered my mother was also playing Teresa Teng's songs, creating a sense of continuity between generations and individuals. It was as though these songs were recitations of our shared history. The music, originally heard during my grandmother's era, resonated with my mother's childhood memories, and eventually found its way into my life. This connection felt like an inheritance that bound our family together, invoking a profound sense of kinship.

Recognizing that direct communication in today's world is often fraught with hesitation, I sought to illustrate this through the medium of text messages. I engraved the text message history with my mother on the record, as well as my text message history with my grandmother, and my mother's text message history with her mother. These seemingly ordinary and trivial daily exchanges comprise the threads that form the tapestry of our relationships.

When the record player spins, the songs intermittently punctuate the airwaves, punctuated by the scratching of the needle against the engraved words. This artistic portrayal encapsulates the essence of my life and the intricacies of my family. Beyond the harmonious melodies lies the authentic tapestry of existence—a narrative that is both complex and mundane. Yet, it is within this seemingly mundane existence that authenticity is found. This artwork embodies one of the most intimate facets of my life, a testament to the intricate threads that shape the tapestry of my family relationships.

In this poignant artwork, I explored the transformation of my relationship with my mother during my high school years. Initially characterized by resistance and avoidance, I summoned great courage to confront the challenges that plagued our connection. The artwork itself was a metaphorical representation of this journey.

The setting I created was an intimate, enclosed space comprising two chairs and a table. However, this table was obstructed by a board, a tangible barrier that symbolized the impediments that had stood between us. To facilitate communication, a rope, entwined with strands of hair, was threaded through the board, and both my mother and I were required to wear it on our hands during our interaction.

As our exchange unfolded, the symbolism of the rope became paramount, for it embodied the intricacies and entanglements of our relationship. At the conclusion of this emotional encounter, a pair of scissors was placed before us, offering us a profound choice. The scissors represented the power to sever the symbolic cord, signifying our agency in determining the fate of our relationship.

For the presentation, I incorporated two distinct audio tracks. One was recorded outside the room, establishing a background ambience, while the other contained the content of our conversation. To maintain the privacy and intimacy of our exchange, I manipulated the audio, rendering the words indecipherable to the audience. This was a deliberate choice, underscoring the deeply personal nature of our dialogue.

In the final act of the presentation, I recreated the scene in front of a projection, sans the board and the dividing rope. This symbolic gesture conveyed the evolution of our relationship, signifying that the awkwardness had given way to a newfound ability to confront it directly.

My artwork serves as a testament to the transformative power of communication and the resilience of relationships, ultimately emerging from the shadows of discomfort into the light of understanding and connection.